Beware of the hiatus

“Beware of the hiatus” indeed – I should have that engraved into a plaque in bold capitals and eight different languages, and put it up somewhere around here, much as Rottweiler-owners (and toy-Chihuahua owners attempting to be witty) have “Beware of the dog”. Definitely worthy of a new tagline, anyways.

I had hoped that I could go longer than over a fortnight before having an extended hiatus; it was my main concern before starting the blog that I’d be hiatusing all over the place and worse, at inopportune moments. Take the last two weeks, for example;

I had a great St Pat’s Day entry worked up for 17 March, all about the history of St Patrick himself and St Patrick’s Day in general; St Pat’s Days I have known; things that annoy me unto rabid frothing at the mouth about St Pat’s Day (Guinness should NOT be green, I mean to say, the stuff is so tarry black any attempt to dye it any sort of colour would have Absolute Zero results, therefore what is served up as green Guinness was never Guinness, most likely Foster’s in a pint glass with a shamrock and/or Irish harp on it; fake New Yorkers who go on about their Irish heritage when they’re mostly descended from arsehole Anglo landlords in Ulster who forced peasants off their land during the potato famine – or are descended from said peasants – and “support the cause in Ireland” which equals donating money for arms to the IRA, the UDA, the PIRA, the UDF, UVF, UFF …).

I also planned a post-hangover entry (not quite as entertaining, perhaps, as drink-and-blogging, but possibly amusing) and a socio-evolutionary piece on why sex is fun.

Instead of these and other entries, my achievements have included two sprained wrists (one twice – my writing hand too), one wrenched muscle in my shoulder, approximately 22 more bruises,  including a black eye. A bit of a misnomer, that last one, it is beautifully colourful and competes with anything a MAC make up artist could do with the entire range at their disposal. It’s mostly shades of purple from deep violet through plums to burgundy. I can’t wait for it to get into the green shades.

Much of the damage was due to my usual klutziness; I also had two falls in the one day (Friday 24 to be precise) the second of which was in the bathroom which is so tiny, if you take two steps in any direction you come up against very solid wall. Having legs give out and falling into said wall proved to me how solid it was, particularly when I cracked my head, smack on the brow ridge, against the sticky-outy corner bit. Ow ow ow ow ow.

Needless to say I’ve been in quite a lot of pain the last two weeks – even by my high standards! – the last time I felt quite so battered and crushed all over was when a 17-hand chunky thoroughbred stallion (a 3-Day Eventer) rolled on me after falling after a jump.

So – my humble apologies and all that, and I will try to stay around a bit longer before I disappear the next time. And I am definitely going to finish writing/re-writing and post that sexy entry.


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  • Dave  On Sunday 2 April 2006 at 1:43 pm

    Your new motto: More thrills; Less spills. Get well soon, hon’.

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