Bleeaauugghhhhh

This is the fourth time I have tried to post this or something like it within the last 48 hours. The weather has been absolutely gross the past week; temperatures around 38C during the day falling to a minimum of about 28C at night, and therefore just generally disgusting, stinky, and unrelentingly vile. The weekend was pretty much a write-off as all Tux and I could do was lie around in sweaty heaps, unable to move further than the fridge for another litre of iced water. There was not even any weekend snuggling as body contact was unthinkable given the heat and humidity. Plus, I didn’t exactly feel sexually attractive being so sweaty and stinky and sticky and bloated and unspeakably GROSS. I’d have a freezing cold shower [1] and be hot and sweating before I’d finished drying off. BLEAAUUUGGHHHHH.

[1] Not so much with the freezing cold, either; the water out of the hot top is always [2] significantly cooler than out of the cold tap [3].
[2] Initially, anyway. Until it eventually starts to run hot which can take about five minutes and then, when you’ve finally got the hot/cold levels balanced perfectly, in the middle of shampoo/conditioner/salt scrub the water will suddenly run freezing/boiling. HATE.
[3] Which does not get any cooler no matter how long you run it, it remains tepid [4].
[4] The reverse of all the above is true for winter.

Air-conditioning would be nice, now. It’s rough, trying to survive Perth summers without air-conditioning … I’m kind of pissed off at our landlady, who charges obscene rent and has threatened to “raise it dramatically”, has not even had a tiny evaporative cooler installed. Every other unit in the complex [of 16] has a cooler or air conditioner. I think it’s time we started flat-hunting again, except its such a pain in the arse. Finding this place was tough enough given our requirements; have to be within short walk of shops, ditto public transport, near a cycleway, be on the ground floor, allow a very polite cat etc. GAH. Not that a/c would be much help given the power went out three times yesterday and each time I was about to either upload a post or pay a bill over the internet banking service. I may have paid the electricity bill four times, I have no way of knowing, how ironic. Pass us a palm frond, would ye?

Not only is the weather atrocious, and the flat a dark little hell-hole, the food served up around here has become very, very boring as it is too hot to have the cooker on. I’ve been making lots of “Salade Nicoise“ type meals. Last night I thawed out a batch of Bolognese sauce from the freezer, cooked some pasta and the increase in ambient temperature made my Shmirnoff Black boil.

Tonight I’m planning a 5-minute stir-fry of home-made red chilli/garlic/ginger paste, chicken or pork mince, some veggies [choy sum, sprouts, water chestnuts – tinned, grated carrot, celery, red capsicum], rice noodles and serve it on a plate with a pile of lettuce leaves on the side and call it Sang Choy Bao. Pile mixture into lettuce leaf, wrap, dip in sweet chilli sauce or nuoc cham [both also home-made] and eat. Totally cheating and cutting corners, not to mention a certain “bugger authenticity” quality, but guaranteed delicious.

As if the weather, food, home and utilities weren’t all kicking my arse hard enough, my pain levels have been way up – really bad muscle spasms in neck and shoulders, both hips are giving me hell and my hands and feet have flared up again; painful and the pins-and-needles sensation is worse, not so much pins-and-needles as stilettos-and rusty-razor-blades. Add a chronic severe headache and pukiness just for fun. I’ve increased the dosage of painkillers etc but the desired effect has failed to eventuate. I think when Tuxedo gets home tonight I’ll send him over to the pub’s bottle-shop/off-licence for a bottle of Bushmills [best. ever. Irish whisky] and I’ll try that brand of anaesthesia … as well. Whisky shot with morphine chaser, mmm mmmmm.

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